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117 Days of James Patterson – Day Seventeen

Day Seventeen, Chapter Seventeen
This is how I have to start my morning, here on Day 17:

Sarah slammed the front door of her apartment and marched out to the car thinking about frickin’ Trevor, who had begged her, “Wait just another minute.”  Only it was an unbearable twenty minutes under his fat, nasty body, and now she was borderline late for work – again.

C’mon, its like 7am on a Saturday, I just poured my first coffee and I’m already being hit with a “frickin'” and a sex scene. See what I do for you people? 

Sarah, on her way to work, tunes her car radio to “Good Morning with Lisa Kerz and Rosemary Van Buren, the place for traffic, weather, and local news”, which informs her of the murder of Casey Dowling the night before. Oh snap.

  • “Sarah stared at the radio as if it were a person…”
  • “Sarah gripped the wheel.”
  • “Sarah’s heart thundered in her chest.”
  • “She ripped her eyes back to the road…”
  • “…jerked the steering wheel…”
  • “…she drove without seeing”

Damn you, Rosemary Van Buren! Your dedication to breaking news and traffic is the reason there are so many bad drivers out there!

Once parked safely in the parking lot of Booker T. Washington High, Sarah makes her way to the teacher’s lounge for her “customary pick-me-up before facing the day.” (I assume that this teacher’s lounge is like all others, and the pick-me-up is a quick bump or a snort, right?)  Still freaking out about the implications of Casey Dowling’s death, Sarah encounters fellow teacher, Heidi Meyer at the “coffee” machine. (wink, wink) 

“You okay, Sarah?”
“Bah. Trevor’s a bastard. Heard enough?”

Sadly, yes, I have heard enough, but I still have 100 days left. Oh, you weren’t talking to me. Heidi, who smells like lilacs, gives Sarah a hug and Sarah buries “her face in the soft cloud of Heidi’s red hair.”

Could Heidi hear her blood roaring? God.

Then, James Patterson finally reveals his dirty old man side, always simmering just below the surface:

Heidi gave Sarah a peck on the lips – and Sarah kissed Heidi back, but harder and with feeling. Heidi’s sweet mouth opening under hers as Sarah put her whole heart into it. If only she could tell Heidi everything.

Yeah, that’s what I’m talkin’ about. I imagine that the conversation between Patterson and his co-author, Maxine Paetro goes something like this:

“Uh, nice work on Chapter 17, Maxine, but I’d like to see a little more girl-on-girl action towards the end. Maybe they could make out in the teacher’s lounge? Or just some heavy petting.”

“Um, okay, Mr. Patterson.”

“Let me watch you while you write it.”

Go to Day Eighteen.


7 comments on “117 Days of James Patterson – Day Seventeen

  1. Naomi Johnson
    May 15, 2010

    I'm glad I waited until evening to read this.

  2. aaryn b.
    May 15, 2010

    Oh my.
    I am fasting today (don't ask) and this would definitely have been better with some coffee and food. That way, I wouldn't suffer dry heaves.

  3. Anonymous
    May 16, 2010

    “Oh, snap”!??? That's what 12 year-olds say!

  4. Seth Marko
    May 16, 2010

    Oh, snap, you got me, Anonymous.

  5. Tiffany
    May 17, 2010

    After this post, I'm bumping your blog up in my RSS feed. Keep it up.

    P.S. Found out about your blog through KPBS Culture Lust.

  6. Seth Marko
    May 17, 2010

    Sweet. Thanks, Tiffany. I'll try not to disappoint – although, that's up to JPatt I guess.

  7. Nate
    May 24, 2010

    Best entry yet. Love the closer.

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This entry was posted on May 15, 2010 by in 117 Days of James Patterson.
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