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117 Days of James Patterson – Day Forty-Four

Day 44, Chapter 44
Chapter 44 is a pivotal chapter in The 9th Judgment, so I need everyone to pay attention.  That’s right, I’m forcing myself to get into this and you’re coming with me.  Pete Gordon, the Lipstick Killer, is at home with his lovely family.  Pete, being a serial killer, is depicted as unstable and potentially violent – how else would you convey this information if you were the author?

Pete Gordon sat in the kitchen, laptop in front of him on the red Formica table, his back to the porch where Sherry was doing stupid puppet tricks for her brother.  The stink bomb was shrieking with joy or fright, Pete didn’t know which, because it was all like having a screwdriver jabbed through his eardrum.

Pete yelled over his shoulder, “Keep it down, Sherry! In a minute, I’m going to take off my belt.”

Pete goes back to composing his “ransom note” – an open letter to the city of San Francisco, presumably about his intentions as the Lipstick Killer.  The kids keep screaming out on the porch, yet Pete doesn’t act, he simmers in his rage and fantasizes about killing his wife and kids.  Perfectly normal.

Pete clenched his hands, thinking how much he hated them and everything about the life he lived now. Look at me, Ladies and Gentlemen, Captain Peter Gordon, former commando, currently Househusband First Class.

What a frickin’ tragedy.

Again, I find it irritating that he actually is former military, since the inept police have reached the same conclusion without any real evidence or investigation, just an assumption derived from the use of a silencer in the murders.  Anyway, Pete claims to only enjoy “working on his plan” and is looking forward to murdering Sherry and “the stink bomb” before he shows his wife “who he really (is)”.  Here it comes, everybody, the revelation: (note, the things that his wife “nags” about seem pretty reasonable, considering he’s a self-proclaimed “househusband”.  A-hole.)

He could hardly wait to silence her nagging. Pete, sweetie, don’t forget to pick up the milk and take your meds, okay? Hey, handsome, did you make lunch for the kids? Make the bed? Call the cable guy?

He imagined Heidi’s face, pale in the middle of all that red hair, eyes like yo-yos when she realized what he had done. And what he was going to do to her.

Hi-hi, Heidi. Bye-dee-bye.

Heidi, Pete’s wife, is the same Heidi that has been seen having gratuitous, girl-on-girl relations with Sarah Wells, the Hello Kitty cat burgler!  The cases are frickin’ related!  OMFG!!!!  I’ve got eyes like yo-yos here!
Go to Day 45.


3 comments on “117 Days of James Patterson – Day Forty-Four

  1. Amy
    June 11, 2010

    Wow, wouldn't have seen that coming, though I guess I should have expected something like that. Lame.

  2. Anonymous
    June 11, 2010

    what would I do without your daily JP blog?!!! Guaranteed laughs…thank you!

  3. Nate
    June 11, 2010

    God, I hate James Patterson. Why can't you just die?

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This entry was posted on June 11, 2010 by in 117 Days of James Patterson.
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